Help With Grief
Loss, and the grief we feel around it, are an inevitable part of the human experience. We lose people and things and we miss them.
As a somatic therapist, I have worked with many people concerning their grief following a significant loss. Physicians and cognitive-behavioral (talk) therapists also refer clients to me for help with their grief when the work they have been doing together has hit a plateau or no longer seems to be helping.
In these situations I generally find that the problem isn’t the client’s grief but their understandable resistance to grieving.
Grieving is painful and can be unpleasant. Some clients are also afraid that if they grieve their loss fully they will lose the only remaining connection they can feel in regard to the person or other being or possession (such as a pet, a job, a home, or even an election) that they have lost. Their resistance can go on for months or even years, which can be quite draining and debilitating compared to letting go. It can also cause or aggravate existing health challenges.
The somatic work I do helps people let go—not of connection—but of the bodily tension or ‘holding on’ they are doing which doesn’t serve them and only delays the relief that comes from gently relaxing and letting go.
In fact, letting go allows for more connection to one’s self, to others, and to our aliveness because we have more space and capacity to feel all of our feelings including our sadness and our joy for the love that we were so fortunate to have experienced.
Many clients actually report feeling more connection, a new one, with the person or possession they lost because they have restored their ability to feel—in the present—the love or other cherished feeling that they felt before. In essence, a new relationship is established—a living one— even in the face of physical loss.
If you have suffered a significant loss and feel stuck or that you can’t move on, consider a gentle, therapeutic approach that works directly with the body and can ease the resistance that may be extending your grief and delaying your healing.
Todd Schwartz is a somatic therapist with offices in Denver and Boulder. To learn more about me and the work I do with clients, please consult my website: toddrschwartz.com. Or, feel free to call me directly at 303.704.8331 to discuss your needs and how I might help.
My somatic work is neither a form of nor a substitute for competent medical or mental health diagnosis, care or treatment. It is, however, a fine complement to these and all other approaches to health and wellness.
Copyright © Todd R. Schwartz, 2025.